♥ The Journey towards PhD ♥

I have been meaning to write everything about my PhD journey long before. This should begin with the application process and many more. However, many things happen. Ok, lame excuses. But I tried to keep my promises to myself. And here I am. Truth to be told. PhD is a lonely journey. It's between you and your research. The journals, articles that contribute to your writing process. Of course, research will get you involved with so many people. But. To get things done. It's you. On your own.  Termenung sane, termenung sini. Kadang-kadang dok ngelamun macam bengong pulak rasa. Hehehe. Ok. Ok. Mandi tak basah. Makan tak lalu. Masak pun malasss. Ini alasan. Agagaga.


I also have been meaning to set up new blog to share my journey towards my PhD attainment. Insha allah. Tapi macam sayang sangat kat blog nih. I started with B2B (bride-to-be) journey. So why don't I just move on with this blog, rite. I even didn't have any plan to change the blog template or layout. I want to remain the 'old' feelings. Blog ni ada sentimental value nya sendiri  :D  I got a lot of friends, virtual friends from here. I am so glad and amazed how this kind of network could touch so many hearts.

Tiny Steps At First

I was granted by the KPT with SLAB (Skim Latihan Akademik Bumiputera) scholarship for 3 years from October 2012 until September 2015. Actually this is my second time being awarded with this scholarship scheme. The first time was for my Masters. Alhamdulillah.

I don’t want to get stucked with my past. It took me 5 years to complete my Masters thesis. All the hard work, they gave me courage to further pursue my PhD. All the ups and downs. Thick and thin. I remember every bit of the words and faces that accompanied me thru my Masters journey.

So now I developed a self-contract. A promise to myself. I really want to finish my PhD as soon as possible. I hope this blog will help me go through it. And set new direction. Big hope.

Yes, I am a bit down at first because I rejected the opportunity to further my studies overseas, unlike two of my colleagues cum makan-mates cum shopping-crime-partner cum gossip teams cum bestfriends. Really missed these two ladies. Sepanjang hidup berjauhan dengan husband time PJJ dulu, mereka nilah teman saya. Kat office, kat rumah. I always slept over at theirs with Delisha.

Delisha untung.. membesar dengan 3 orang mak. Sampai orang konpius maknye yang sebenar yang mana satu.

It has been my dreams. I am not regretting it. So much so, I am doing the right things now and the most important things, I have been surrounded by my loved ones. It was a tough decision.

Well.. I have stacks of files and documents regarding the Cuti Belajar application and SLAB.Of courselah I simpan semua details yang buat hidup I tunggang terbalik for several months. Berbulan, okeh.

SLAB Application Process

If you wish to further your study abroad, and specifically in US, there are language test requirement (TOEFL) and entrance exam that include both mathematics/statistics and language (GRE). First things first.  Need to register first at www.ets.org. I registered for GRE in January 2012 and TOEFL in March 2012. The fees for both exams are USD185 and USD180. Please refer to the official website for further info.

Kena study bebetul naaa.. Kalau tak, kena repeat exam. And make sure you keep all the receipts. For UTM staffs, can claim only once, regardless how many times you sit for the exams. Sigh. In my case, I couldn't make claim for the fees as these requirement wasn't needed for Cuti Belajar Dalam Negara. Time nih, nak study punyelah mencabar jiwa raga.

Kenangan study TOEFL dengan Delisha. Time nih Delisha and I selalu ulang-alik KL pi amik exam and gi UPM jumper SV and Viva internal examiner. Huarrrgh. Thesis corrections were a disaster. Wink. 

My GRE

I would say.. susah gile kot exam nih. Kata-kata dari seseorang yang mase SPM dulu Add Math mesti tak lulus! Sebab ada soklan kira-kira, I jadik sangat nebesss.. My score, cukup-cukup je. Sampai ngigau main-main dengan kalkulator. Pastu kalau dengan result yang macamni, kena survey satu-satu university yang letak requirement rendah untuk GRE.

Time nak gi amik exam ni, kena dah ade nama-nama dan kod universiti yang kita nak apply. Result akan dihantar direct kepada universiti tersebut. Isi terus online, kalau hari lain baru nak isi, kena extra charges which is too costly. Mahal! Kot kalu banyak duit, tak ngape. Hehe.

My TOEFL

Kena study jugak.. dan pulun habis-habisan. Petuanye, kena make urself familiar with the test format. Yang penting strategi. Kalau takde strategi takleh la nak menang. Kate nak gi berperang dengan ilmu kannn. Good universities put high scores as requirement. :)

Test takers, don't forget to bring your international passport for identification. Both exams were held at the test center. 

PROMETRIC TESTING CENTER,
SUITE 21A-15-1, FABER IMPERIAL COURT
JALAN SULTAN ISMAIL (SHERATON HOTEL)
KUALA LUMPUR
50250 Malaysia
Phone:  60376283333

Kursus Biro Tatanegara 

Genap Delisha setahun lebih. First time berjauhan dengan Delisha. Time ni husband masih kerja di KL. Nak bawak Delisha ke KL, husband pulak kerja. So my parents came to Senai untuk ambil Delisha. Kursus 6 hari. 6 hari tanggung rindu. Seksa! Kursus ni diadakan di Akademi Kenegaraan Jalan Bellamy, KL. It was fun! Funlah sangat kan.. banyak topik kenegaraan, perlembagaan, discussions, patriotisme.. things yang I dah lame macam tak amik port. Huhu. 


Pregnant Amirul 3 bulan ++. I sengaje tak bawak pump and breastfeeding gadget sebab susu dah menyusut. Sekalinyeeee. Hmmm.. rasakanlah penangan bengkak susu. Thanks to my Blogger-mate MAMA NAJLA -AZIAN yang sanggup datang ke Akademi, bagi pinjam Cooler bag ngan ice packs. Dapatlah I ber-marmet bagaiiii. Ada pantry untuk ibu-ibu yang menyusukan anak. Good.


Rindu sangat kat Delisha time ni. Meleleh air mata time nak tidur malam. I missed my direct feeding session with her. Miss her smell. Siap bawak baju Delisha. And.. Delisha pun sama rupanya.. rindu kat mama. Malam-malam cari mama. Nasib baik tak meragam. Dah 3 hari berjauhan barulah my mom and dad reveal yang Delisha sebenarnye tengah demam. Demam rindu agaknye. I cried looking at her pix. Masha allah my lil girl. So skinny. Tak bermaya. Tengok balik gambar ni. Sedih rasa hati.

 

 

I promised to myself, I won't leave her again. :(

Interview with Faculty Study Leave Panel (15^th May 2012)

Interview with University Study Leave Panel (15^th September 2012)

Study Leave Approval from MOHE (November 2012)

SLAB Allowance

Allowance: The best thing that you ever had within this journey is extra money to buy books, to buy new cartridge for your printer because it seems like there are so many things in this whole wide world need to be printed. Sungguhla tak support Kempen Hijau. Paperless is good but I couldn't read and digest so many words by just reading it online or on the screen. Extra penny to spend during depressed mode nak kena bagi draft proposal pada SV. Ehems.

My study leave started last 31 October 2012. The first allowance (now KPT using Bank Islam account) was on 24^th December amounting RM5325. Book allowance: RM825. ‘Perkakas’ allowance: RM900. ‘Sara Hidup’ allowance RM900/month: (once in 4 months, from October, November, December 2012, January 2013).

To SLAB-ians or SLAI-ians, jadual elaun 2013 macam belum ada tapi boleh agak bila payment masuk account. Kadang-kadang lambat dalam 2 minggu.

Just got the second allowance yesterday for February-March-April-May 2013. What did I just bought? Not revealing it.. yet.  :)

Grab some book from Amazon.com

Mula-mula, saya belanjakan duit elaun buku tu ke jalan yang benar dan diredhai iaitu dengan membeli bahan ilimah. Hehe. Terlebih sikit, top-up guna duit yang berbaki. Rambang mata la tengok buku. Being a researcher, kalau tak suke baca buku sila lah daftar semula kat Jobstreet. Carik keje lain. Sekian. :D

Got some other books in the Amazon.com shopping carts. But have to wait. Khatamkan dulu mana yang dah ada ni.

The Progress Report

Well, there are three types of progress report that need to be filled.

Once in 6-month. KPT.

Once in 3-month. As a student and as study leave staff.

Six-Month Time

It has been six month. So where am I right now? Banyak lagi kerja perlu disiapkan. 

Read, read, read, O Muhammad (pbuh)...

The writing progress: haywire. Eheh. A bit slow due to many readings. Why? I read so many things and it brought me to another direction.LOL.

Sekarang, kalau Delisha nakal sangat.. Menangis tak tentu pasal..etc.  I doa banyak-banyak semoga Allah kurniakan kesabaran dan jangan sekali-kali lepaskan ammarah pada Delisha.. kerana Delisha bersama dengan Mama thru thick and thin. Sayang Delishaaaaaa. 

And of course, Amirul. 

Satu masa dulu I pernah terdengar a talk by Dato' Fadzilah Kamsah and he said, baby dalam perut akan stress kalau maknye tengah belajar. Harap both of my babies taklah stress sangat time mama belajar ni walaupn dua-due dah selamat keluar dary tummyland. 

Bagi mama semangat, k.  Panjang sungguh entry kali ni. :)